Of Cows and Super PACs

                Six below zero in Fremont, Nebraska Saturday morning last.

                It had warmed up to 10 before I headed north to Wayne in the ragtop Jeep Wrangler my niece was kind enough to lend me for my visit back to Nebraska from Florida.  It is possible I will be banned from winter trips to the Midwest, as up til now, the weather has been mild.  Unseasonably warm even.  The day I landed in Sioux Falls, a storm dumped 10 to 16 inches of snow from Denver to Omaha. Temperatures plummeted and stayed plummeted until I boarded the plane to leave on Monday.  Tuesday the forecast is for moderating weather in the 40s.  I do apologize.  

                But I got to thinking about the difference in temperature between Fremont, Nebraska and Jupiter, Florida, and the twenty-three and a half degree tilt of the earth on its vertical axis that causes that difference.  That tilt gives the temperate zones of the earth their seasons, and provides a steady stream of snow birds heading south in the fall, some like myself relocating permanently.

                It’s not much of a difference, that tilt.  But without it, the seasons wouldn’t change, and temperatures would remain in a relatively constant range traveling from the equator to the poles.  And that got me to thinking about the fragility of our life here on earth.  A little research shows that that tilt isn’t really a constant.  It oscillates from 22 degrees to 24.5 degrees on a 41,000-year-cycle. 

                I can write all this stuff about the earth’s tilt, and know that to a high degree of probability, you’ll believe me.  However, if as a contractor, I put a sign on a wall that says “Wet Paint”, you’ll probably have to touch it, just to make sure. 

                This brings me to politics.

                The Republicans aren’t yet done beating up on each other, but the attack ads on President Obama have already begun, thanks to the bilious, pestilent super PACs.  And the Democrats are beginning to fill the airwaves with their own version of the same.  And they all intone with absolute authority how their particular candidate knows and cares about global warming, international finance and relationships, hydraulic fracturing and oil exploration and energy in general, and the price of a cup of coffee in Wayne, Nebraska.

                The next time your jaw tightens as you discuss the relative merits of your candidate or your party versus another, and the grand promises and omniscience they profess, give some thought to Wet Paint.  Give it the touch test.

                I am from the Midwest.  Typically, Midwesterners aren’t prone to hyperbolic bloviating.  And I use the last two words intentionally, because as a Midwesterner, I typically wouldn’t.  It’s overstated and pretentious, but sounds good.  But if you listen to the sound of it, you hear “hyper”, which makes sense as a lot of unnecessary gaseous ventilation, and “bloviate” which sounds a bit like “bovine,” which we in the Midwest hear as “cow.”   

                The next time your jaw tightens as you discuss the relative merits of your candidate or your party versus another, and the grand promises and omniscience they profess, give some thought to Wet Paint.  Give it the touch test.  Or simply think of gaseous cows.  That would be a good working definition of Super PACs.  In my humble opinion.

Comments

[Fort Fey]

Ohh, that was just a lil bit of a chilly breeze ya felt. The gaseous cows in office, I think we might be stuck in that ice and storm for a spell longer.

[Jim]

The Obama Victory Fund 2012 will have a “Breakfast with the President” fundraiser next Thursday, February 16, at the home of Jeff and Nancy Stack in Corona del Mar, Calif. Breakfast itself will cost $2,500 per guest. Entry to the event’s photo reception will cost $10,000, and a “greet and breakfast” package will cost $35,800.
Change ?

[Dave]

Boy am I glad I live in Hawaii - no snow! Always wanted to visit Nebraska - big sky country and may actually get a chance this summer.